It’s time to stop the social backlash for women negotiating their salaries, don’t you think? Here’s a real life example of how it happens and one reason I think it occurs.

Men! I want to hear from you in the comments if you’ve ever experienced backlash or if it’s truly a female issue. Women let me know your stories too!

My friend works for a large corporation and a few years ago she hired a woman for one of her open positions. This person came in very qualified, crushed it in the interview and was offered the job.

The candidate refused the first offer and negotiated a much higher salary. Well, this really angered the female Human Resources (HR) person at her company.

According to my friend, the candidate deserved the higher salary and the first offer was admittedly a “low ball offer.” The employee has been outstanding for several years now, worth every penny, but the HR person still resents her!

Even years later she holds a grudge against this employee for essentially knowing her worth and asking for it.

Why does this happen?

Well in my opinion it happens because the HR employee herself is being underpaid and she knows it. She is holding a grudge because somewhere deep down she knows she should’ve asked for more or should be paid more, she resents another woman for going after what she deserves!

I know that most employees in HR have access to payroll data so they can see what every single person is making. I also know that if you don’t take time to ensure that you are making the salary you deserve, looking at the pay rates of others can make you crazy!

When you are happy with your pay rate, looking at those numbers is just that, numbers. Like looking at your household budget or your banking account. It’s just data.

This is why you need to make sure you are in the position you want with the pay you deserve. We want to be high-fiving the woman who comes in and gets the salary she can command based on her skills, not criticize her and make her life hard every day after, right?

Plus, the HR person is not doing her job effectively because she’s holding onto that resentment and according to my friend is not really helping the employee when she needs HR support. Which is sad, isn’t it?

There are many articles on this social backlash and how to approach it. I’m going to stand firm by saying if you own it, don’t get emotional about your negotiations, you won’t have these repercussions. It’s this feeling that we are doing something wrong, apologizing or making it seem “nice” that ultimately gives off the energy that we can be treated poorly.

We can’t.

Negotiate. Get the money you want and if someone has an issue with it, it’s THEIR problem. You really don’t want to work for employers that treat you unfairly anyway, right?

Let’s stop the social backlash for women negotiating their salaries, both by not participating in it and also not accepting it!”

There’s no shame in exploring those feelings that make us uncomfortable (like negotiating) and turning them into gold. If you haven’t read this post on how to know your worth and align your energy to it, it’s a must!

I’d love to hear from you in the comments if you’ve experienced this social backlash and what others reasons there are that you think this happens.

XOXO,